Bitter Sweet Dreams

We all got sooo excited! A foreign cake shop has been opened in our neighbourhood. Wohooo! Cupcakes, brownies, caramel slices, muffins, pop cakes, famous apple pie, all that on our door step.

Phones are ringing, messages are flowing and emails are being sent, so that finally we all met at the city square and walked over the bridge to the old bazaar..

While walking, sweet words were coming out of our mouths. I was able to hear the boys in front sharing a recipe and the girls around me chatting about experiences gathered on the travels enriched by a delicious puddings and desserts. Everyone around me was eager to get to the place and the walking pace increased into a running. It did not take long to locate this cake shop as it is right next door to a well known to us, a vinary.

We sat on the decked veranda overlooking the old bazaar. Small wooden benches and tables neatly positioned on the veranda, were leaving very much a feel of a comfortable and cozy place to be. Surprisingly there was no music to link the place. A smiley chap approached our group, welcoming us broadly to the newly opened cake shop. Surprisingly there was not a menu. Instead one by one were asked to go inside and choose from the selection of cakes on offer. This place was hiding more surprises for us. There were only five types of small cakes to choose from. By the time I got the turn to choose, there were no cakes left on the plates in the fridge. Surprisingly I could see the emptiness, I could see the void between a cake and no cake. Is this a reality, is this a childish game or is it just a life lesson teaching simple disappointment? A cake shop with no cakes?

A cake shop with no cakes to buy, with no cakes to share, with no cakes to see at all? Isnt this the same as going to a tea house, but no tea available to drink? Or to a wine tasting evening but no wines to sample?

Was I having a great expectation about being able to taste something different in my home land or was it just a hope to see the world shrinking on my dessert plate? Whichever way, that gave the impression that disappointment was greatly bigger than any other feeling at this moment. It came as a wave and affected everyone within the group. Those who had a slice kindly offered to share with the rest. We got to taste them and that as far as it went. For those visiting after us, a cake shop with no cakes was more real then ever before…M

Planet M

Thinking whether to tell you the truth or something beautiful, I decided to stick to the truth all the way. I hope that it will make you proud and honoured and fill you with joy and smiles…

My recent life changing event, left me with two hearts, one small and blissfully unaware of the reality and other one confused and shocked. As time goes by it was inevitable to learn that everything happens for a reason and this is the reason that makes me stronger, makes me a better person in some way or another. Little time was required to recover, away from any obstacles, negativities and ugly forces. Little time was required to rewrite my goals, my objectives and my dreams. Although, my words are my reality, my dreams are keeping me alive!

And as it is in life, at time least expected, we come accross people who bring a smile on our face. People who do inspire and keep us moving. People who can enter our dreams and generously share their aspirations, love and kindness. Many of these people we meet will become friends for life, and will form part of our character. And yes you are right, I don’t even know you, I haven’t even met you, neither seen you, and yet I’ve felt tremendous kindness and positivity radiating from your end.

So, by coincidence or simple synchronicity (who knows), I named my baby boy Marko. My little warrior was very eager to arrive earlier, to meet me, to show me his gratitude and true value in life. He came out very quickly, causing as little pain as possible, and as little damage as possible…

And trully, he gets all my affection, he is my little precious soul, my dragon, my little tigarce and my creator. I wish I could share my joy and be part of a family but my reality is very much a lonely journey, designed for endless strive to achieve and be entirely responsible for another being.

Truthfully, don’t even know if I ever be able to meet you, neither that these words will be read by you and yet I felt obliged to write them down.

Anyhow, maybe nothing is clear for the future, but the fact that I’ve equipped myself for the worst that life can throw at me, gives me great strength and confidence to walk forward. And as promised…There is no option of giving up at any point in my life.

With great hope for love and light on this journey,

M&M

Live boldly, follow your dreams, take risks, look after your friends and smile when the mountain is steepest…Bear Grylls